What to do next?
I am only half-heartedly looking for another job. The truth is that I don’t actually want to teach anymore. 5 months of teaching in England has changed my perception of the job completely. I see it now as a torture, to a greater or lesser extent.
The thought of going into another school and facing another horde of rude, obnoxious children fills me with despair. That is not what I went into teaching for. I did it to inspire creativity and to share what I love doing most in this world, not to fight and argue with teenagers who have no ability or interest in what I am teaching anyway. I am not a correctional officer. I derive no pleasure haranguing kids. In fact I hate it.
As an alternative to teaching I thought of doing a Masters in Art Therapy in London. The problem is that it is an expensive course that takes 2 years full time to complete. That is a big investment in something that is essentially an escape route from teaching.
I would be keen to do a Masters degree in Fine Art or Illustration so that I could get into lecturing but I have some reservations about that too. To begin with I don’t know what I would want to do. I have no particular angle or style or direction.
All in all I don’t know what I am meant to be doing with my life. I wish that I could just do art and be left in peace, but of course it is not that simple. Somehow I need to earn a living in a way that does not make living itself a horrible thing.
Comments
I know exactly how you feel. I am in the same boat. By the way, I submitted a resignation letter the other day, whicih my immediate supervisor has not had a chance to read yet, due to the long weekend.
I love your creativity that shows in your art work. You are talented, Martin.